Palantir Earnings Call: What Happened and Who Believes It

The Palantir Hype Train: Are We *Really* Buying This?

Okay, another week, another avalanche of earnings reports. Palantir, AMD, McDonald's... the whole damn S&P 500 is lining up to tell us how awesome they are. Or, y'know, how they're "managing expectations" which is code for "we screwed up but please don't sell our stock."

But let's cut the crap and talk Palantir. This AIP (Artificial Intelligence Platform) thing is getting shoved down our throats like a Thanksgiving turkey.

Palantir: The Emperor's New AI Clothes?

So, Palantir apparently "exited last quarter with its first billion-dollar quarter." Big deal. My local bodega probably made a killing on overpriced snacks last quarter, too. Doesn't mean they're reinventing the wheel. And this "Rule of 40 score of 94"? Give me a break. It's a metric cooked up by venture capitalists to justify their insane valuations. It ain't real.

Then comes the Citigroup analyst Tyler Radke, bless his heart. He sees "positive checks across Government and Commercial businesses." Positive checks? What does that even MEAN? Are they cashing checks? Are the checks bouncing? Are they getting paid in rubles?

And this "AIP is becoming core infrastructure as customers re-platform for faster deployment and measurable ROI." Translation: "We’re selling you something you don’t understand, but it sounds important, and your competitors are doing it, so you better buy it too."

Here's the thing that REALLY gets me. Everyone's so hyped about AI, they're throwing money at anything that sounds like AI. Palantir's been around for ages, doing data analysis for governments and corporations. Now they slap "AI" on it and suddenly it's the second coming?

And let's be real, Palantir is not exactly known for its transparency. Remember when they were all secretive about who their government clients were? Good times.

AMD: Can They Keep Up?

AMD, on the other hand, is a different beast. The article mentions UBS analyst Timothy Arcuri expecting a strong report, driven by server and client CPU. Fine. Whatever. But then he says AMD could guide as high as $9.5B, "driven by renewed server upgrade activity and some spillover from AI into traditional compute infrastructure as the industry embarks on new strategies to prepare for more AI processing in the data processing market."

Did you catch that? "Some spillover from AI into traditional compute infrastructure." So, even AMD is riding the AI wave. Are they ACTUALLY innovating, or just rebranding their existing stuff as "AI-ready"? According to Earnings playbook: AMD and Palantir set to report in another busy week, AMD and Palantir were set to report in another busy week.

I mean, offcourse, AMD reported weaker-than-expected earnings last quarter even as revenue exceeded expectations. How does that even work? It's like saying "we sold a ton of stuff, but we still lost money."

And the history? AMD averages a 1.6% drop on earnings days. So much for the hype.

Oh, I almost forgot about Uber. Apparently, they're expecting earnings to drop 40% year-over-year, even after authorizing a $20 billion share buyback. Talk about desperation.

So, What's the Real Story?

It's all smoke and mirrors. These companies are masters of manipulating the narrative. They tell us what we want to hear, and we eat it up. Palantir's "growth," AMD's "AI-readiness," Uber's... well, Uber's just trying to stay afloat. But let's be honest - are we just suckers falling for the same old song and dance?